Long Hair Boys: Is it Really Worth the Debate?

There has been an interesting phenomenon in our culture surrounding the debate between those who believe that boys should be able to have long hair and those that do not. What is most interesting is that this debate has been going on for generations, often with the same discussions taking place.

With our teenage son, we have had this same debate. Like his mother, his hair is very thick and has nice body to it. What this means for his locks is that it can get rather unruly. His father, being very traditional, believes that the long hair is unnecessary and should be cut – often forgetting the length of his own hair when we first met.

In this particular issue, it is easy for us as parents to worry what other people will think of us or our parenting when we allow our son to wear his hair in this way. What we really should be concerned with is whether or not other people are viewing our son as the great kid he is, or immediately passing judgment based on the way he wears his hair.

The length of hair on boys has been a significant topic in Texas this past year. Several news sites and blogs have touched on the issue. One news site discussed the obstacles four boys were facing at school. It seems the length of their hair was in question as a violation of the school’s dress code. Another site offered support from parents who believed these boys should be able to wear their hair any way they desired.

Probably the biggest challenge here is determining what the battle really is. Are we battling with our kids to get them to look and dress they way we want? Are we trying to get our kids to conform to social norms with no real basis? Or, are we trying to protect them from the judgments of others?

As a teen, our son is navigating the unstable waters of adolescence and in his attempt to find his place in this world, he is exploring different aspects of who he wants to be. Right now, he wants to be a teenager who wears his hair long and out of control while he plays in a band with his friends. While it might mean that he may lose respect from others who will quickly judge him on his looks, it could also mean that he respects himself for staying true to who he believes he is.